Apologies for my recent "soul tantrum"

On occasion, I will make a post which is not appropriate for the moment.  My recent post asking for my Twin Soul to show herself to me was a perfect example of that.  The fact is, this should not be done unless one feels whole in oneself.  This post was a failure of judgment, an act of desperation, and I apologize for it.

Making demands or crying for help is neither appropriate, just or proper.  That is like telling the universe "this is how I want it!"  The universe will look at us and simply give us the "silent treatment."  Much like a parent, friend or loved one would do when we behave like petulant children, this is a measure used to remind us not of the pecking order, but of the fact that we are, in fact, already whole.  It is really a matter of understanding ourselves and, when necessary, getting some outside assistance.  A friend of mine recently assisted in this, providing necessary perspective, guidance and opinion, as well as a refresher of what underlying causes may exist.  This sort of thing is essential when we are working to become one and whole within ourselves.  Her words resonated with me, and I am grateful to have such a trusted friend.

That being said, there is something to be said for integrating western concepts of psychology with ancient knowledge and esoteric thought.  When we are not balanced mentally, it's easy to slip into another world and want to escape.  Reality is, boiled down to its essence, a rough place to hang out.  We face many challenges in our waking life, whether it be financial, emotional or physical.  Rather than dwelling on what's not there, creating something better should be the goal.  Blaming others for what happened in life gives them power over you.  Taking back that power, being true to one's own self, is true power.  Forgiveness is key, as is the willingness to ask "it happened, but it is any longer relevant?"  Sometimes it takes a long time, especially if that identity and ability to reconcile one's own sense of self has been compromised for many years.  It requires a conscious decision, and complete unison between waking mind and higher mind.  This mastery requires discipline and can take years to accomplish, sometimes a whole lifetime.

I will never profess to having all the answers.  In fact, if anything has been proven over the last week, it's that I have so few answers and so very much to learn.  I am constantly thirsting for knowledge, understanding and the burning desire to become a better person.  I wish to help others, and become the person I am determined to be.  Becoming whole in myself requires integration of what's already there.  We are already whole - it's just a matter of unlocking that knowledge and integrating it into our being.  Whether it is because of mental trauma, physical pain, or some sort of life event which left us with wounds never healed, integration sometimes requires outside help.

Seeking help is never weakness.  Rather, it requires true strength of self to recognize when you can't go it alone and need that hand up.  We learn by living, experiencing, and practicing that which is right and just for us.  The universe grants up free will for a reason; to allow us to learn.  Yet free will is only a tool, it's only as useful as our willingness to learn.  Understanding our reactions to the actions of others affords us greater understanding.  As much as we can predict what may happen based on esoteric science and ancient wisdom, it is merely that, a forecast based on the data at hand.  It is no more set in stone than the weather forecast for the next day.

My gratitude to you all for reading, and for your indulgence of my brief tantrum.  Reason and wisdom remain my goal.  I'm no master, nor am I a hero, teacher or guru.  I'm simply sharing my confusion on the road to greater understanding and enlightenment.  Thank you for joining me.